If you’re looking for a way of coping that will work as ‘well’ as cutting or similar enough to it that it won’t make a difference then you’re likely not going to recover just yet. That’s bottom line. There is nothing that is a quick fix like cutting or other forms of self-destruction.
You need to heal from the pain that has been caused by either yourself or others. Self mutilating won’t do that as it will only take away the pain for short periods of time and then the pain will come back. There may come a point in the future where you heal on your own but some people in their thirties or beyond are still self harming.
You need to make your choice, whether if you want a quick fix that only works for short periods of time or you want to grit your teeth and work through the pain to get a more lasting fix to the bad feelings.
- For Parents
- Cut Ties
- Alternative Sensations
If you are a parent and you found out that your children cut, don’t take away their things! Don’t punish them! Don’t get angry at them and force them to promise you this and that for it will only make matters worse. Unless your child takes control of his/her life and wants to make a change, no matter what you say or do, it doesn’t matter.
The first step is to listen. Listening is really helpful for it leads to understanding the underlying cause for cutting. Realize that your child is in an unstable emotional state and needs all the loving support that you can provide. Make them feel appreciated and recognize their needs. Trust has to be built first before you are let in to their world. If at the beginning, they refuse to open up to you, just let your child know that you will always be there for them. The moment they are ready, they will naturally come running into your open arms, pouring their hearts out knowing you’d be there to catch them as they fall.
Your husband, boyfriend or partner that is causing you to repeatedly feel the need to cut yourself. You feel ignored, bullied, helpless and insecure. The moment you realize you have been taken for granted repeatedly, leave. Take back control and protect yourself by setting boundaries or cutting all ties if necessary.
Love is the most sacred of all bonds. When you say you’re in a relationship with somebody, you are entrusting that person to respect this sacred bond. If you have entrusted your love to this person and do not receive it right back, you will begin treating yourself with the degree of disrespect that the person you’re in a relationship shows you. It determines how you see yourself and in turn, your self worth determines the success and failure you have in life.
Eat extremely hot and spicy food.
Just hold ice to wherever you want to cut yourself until it goes numb.
Swear your heart out in enclosed spaces like inside a car, into the pillow, etc.
The next time you feel like cutting, take a marker or pen instead and draw a fish on the intended spot and put the name of a person who means A LOT to you in the body. It may be a parent, a best friend, a pet, or even your favourite artist. You MUST let it fade naturally, no scrubbing it off. If you cut before it fades, you’ve ‘killed’ the fish and caused ‘harm’ to the ones you love. In Buddhism, the fish symbolizes happiness and freedom. Check out some of the quotes from the most inspiring human being of today.
A groundbreaking study published in the February 2005 issue of the Medical Science Monitor shows for the first time that playing a musical instrument can reverse multiple components of the human stress response on the genomic level. The results of the study suggest that engagement in a calming expressive ability proves significantly effective than merely sitting down to relax, just like reading.
Push yourself to your limit until you have to grit your teeth towards the end of sets in the gym. Join your local martial arts society and master either kickboxing, karate, jujitsu, wushu, kungfu, taekwondo. The idea is to keep yourself motivated physically and mentally while developing discipline and character at the same time.
Join a dance class be it salsa, ballroom, tap, etc. Dancing teaches you to respect yourself and another person of the opposite sex. As time goes by you get better, and the better you get the more confident you become, making it easier to relax and feel self assured. Dancing also provide you with a sense of achievement after every lesson and dance routine knowing that you have mastered a skill that will last you a lifetime.
There are endless charitable organizations all over the world no matter where you are. Good examples include Red Cross, Make-A-Wish, your local hospital, Tzu Chi, etc. Your local pet shelter is one of the best places to start with. Volunteering your time to love and care for abandoned pets makes you a more responsible and kind hearted person.
JCI is the only worldwide non-political and non-sectarian youth service organization. It is an international community of citizens between the ages of 18 to 40 with the aim and purpose of creating positive changes in the world. The organization believes that these changes must result from one taking “collective action to improve themselves and the world around them”. The idea for joining JCI is to socialize with a positive aim. Locate a JCI club near you today.
Toastmasters is an educational organization that operates clubs worldwide for the purpose of helping members improve their communication, public speaking and leadership skills. Through its thousands of member clubs, Toastmasters International offers a program of communication and leadership projects designed to help you learn the arts of speaking, listening, and thinking. Find a location near you and check it out.
Finding the right therapist may take some time. It